You’ve finished downloading this issue’s Soundtrack. Now what? If you’re feeling sinister you could a) go off and see a minister, b) stay and play with yourself or c) start an S&M Bible study club. If you want to be olive green you could a) wear corduroy trousers, b) eat lentils with leeks or c) move into a filing cabinet. If you’re switched on Bach you could a) stay a Walter, b) switch to Wendy or c) sue a Momus. If you are gay and married in Middle America you could a) have your license temporarily suspended, b) have your license permanently revoked or c) wind up in jail. If you want to be a part-time punk you could a) buy the Read About Seymour single but only if pressed in red, b) pogo in the bedroom or c) never use toothpaste. If you want to be a typical girl you could a) buy the magazine, b) get the typical boy or c) be unsure what to wear. If your boyfriend’s got no fashion sense you could a) try not to take offense, b) tell him to go to Next or c) kiss him and forget. This Soundtrack could be titled a) Choose Your Own Soundtrack, b) W.W.R.D. (What Would Rivet Do?) or c) Rivet is the Heavenly Option.

THE TRACKLIST
Belle & Sebastian If You’re Feeling Sinister
Death By Chocolate Olive
Momus Wendy Carlos
Stereo Total In/Out
Trachtenburg Family Slideshow Players Middle America
Digable Planets La Femme Fetal
Black Box Recorder Wonderful Life
Television Personalities Part Time Punks
The Slits Typical Girls
Heavenly C Is the Heavenly Option