Come now, do you really have time to be reading right now? Isn’t there something remotely constructive you could be doing with your life? When’s the last time you checked your to-do list, much less checked anything off it? What you need is us. Get up, make a buck. An honest job. No more trying to cobble a career out of making life-size models of the Velvet Underground in clay. Walk the dog. Clean the fridge out. Read back issues of Rivet. Call your mom. This heaven gives you migraine. You wonder if this is what New York couples fight about. You smile so much when you see life on MTV. Don’t you know straight hair ain’t got no curl! Snap out of it! Fix the car. Pay the bill. Check the email. Download this issue’s MP3 soundtrack from your favorite file sharing application. Get sued. You don’t wanna grow up. Too much contradiction. Makes you wish that you could be a dog. Do the laundry. Take the trash out. Use the toilet. You’re tryin’ and you’re tryin’ and you’re tryin’ and you’re tryin’ to let it go let it go let it go let it go.

THE TRACKLIST
Prince Pop Life
Belle & Sebastian Expectations
Gang of Four Natural’s Not In It
The Fall What You Need
Blanket Music Walk the Dog
Miss Kitten & The Hacker Life on MTV
Pavement Conduit for Sale!
Morcheeba What New York Couples Fight About
Television Friction
Tom Waits I Don’t Wanna Grow Up
Screamin’ Jay Hawkins Constipation Blues
Brian Eno Deep Blue Day